Tag: Music

Eurosong Fever 2026… THE FINAL!

Oops. Turns out I missed the 2nd semi-final of this years’ Eurovision. Well, I didn’t exactly miss it as I recorded it, I just…. erm, didn’t watch it. Been a busy little beaver this week, and by that, I mean I was sat there on Thursday and Friday, with my thumb only partially wedged up my arse. Thursday was the Premier League darts anyway. This does mean, however, that a lot of tonight is going to be a mystery. I think that makes it a little more interesting anyway. Anyway, in order to get some type of preparation done ahread of the prgramme, so I’m not wasting half the time copying and pasting, here are the 25 songs, in order they’re appearing. Allegedly.

The intro is starting off with some singer who apparently can only communicate with dogs. Was that last years’ winner? I barely looked at it last year. (Yes, he was the winner, AJ, or something) Do they have these flag parades every year? If so, I’ve not taken any motice.

Apparently you can vote now, before any of the acts have played.

And Grahan Morton really doesn’t like the hosts, he’s been hilarious so far already. Aaaaaaaaaand here we go…

1. Denmark: Søren Torpegaard Lund – Før Vi Går Hjem

I think this is one of the ones I’ve not heard before. Can’t remember it anyway Takes place in a “perspex box they haven’t managed to clean properly”. Supposed to be a favourite, but it’s pretty forgettable. Actually, saying that, it’s got better as the song went on. Turns out I quite like that one. “Must be like a petrie dish in that plastic box”. Hahaha!

2. Germany: Sarah Engels – Fire

Ah yes. I remember this one. It’s the one where I didn’t blink for about 3 minutes. Would love to see this one do well. Quite a catchy song, by my word, that stage performance. I’ve gone more bong-eyed than usual.

3. Israel: Noam Bettan – Michelle

Ohhhh, this is where the fun starts. Still think it’s a pretty mediocre song to be fair. Heard much better. that means it’ll probably do really well.

4. Belgium: ESSYLA – Dancing on the Ice

Oh god, it’s the “Dancing on the ice” one. I was dgoing to take a drink every time she sings “Dancing On The Ice”, but I’d like to see tomorrow. 13 times, if I counted correctly.

5. Albania: Alis – Nân

Oh, don’t think this had subtitles last time. Something about a dead mother, apparently. Oh, actually, this wasn’t the one I was thinking of. A bit depressing that one.

And now there’s a break. Only 20 songs to go.

6. Greece: Akylas – Ferto

Oh, it’s him with the tiger hat. Or something. It’s the retro graphics one. I didn’t think it’d come even close, but typically, it was the first one through. And apparently, he’s dressed up as a cat, not a tiger. Same thing. In a way. My opinion hasn’t changed much on the 2ns play, it’s still not brilliant. This was the one I thought the last one was, because of the mother character.

7. Ukraine: LELÉKA – Ridnym

I don’t think I heard this one. A 28 second high note in the middle. I can’t get away from the fact that she looks like Diane Morgan though. Don’t know what to make of that one. Was waiting for it to get going and it never really did, but not the worst song I’ve heard.

8. Australia: Delta Goodrem – Eclipse

Ah, now this one’s supposed to be good. Imagine if this one wins and they end up having to host it in Australia. That’d be amusing. Actually, yeah, this one is good, and probably the best one of the night so far. even a bit of a piano solo. And a key change. If this doesn’t do well, I’ll eat a kangaroo. Or something.

9. Serbia: LAVINA – Kraj Mene

The metal one. I did like this one. Pointy nails, pointy outfits. Something I forgot to mention last time, is that the microphone stand is a stand. that amused for me for some reason, and still does. I’d love to see this one do well. even if it’s shouty. We’re not even half way through.

10. Malta: AIDAN – Bella

Bella Bella Bella. This one’s garbage. The most forgettable one so far.

11. Czechia: Daniel Zizka – CROSSROADS

Ha. Faulty camera moment. I don’t think that’s a video effect. It went when they switched to another camera. Not keen on the song though. Apparently, the cameraman fell, which caused the distortion. Admittedly, it’s probably what I will remember about the song.

12. Bulgaria: DARA – Bangaranga

this son’g apparently really catchy. Yup. This is proper eurovision fodder. If I thought that ‘Dancing on the ice’ one was repetitive, this this one might top it. And, at the halfway point in this song, we’re half way through the competition.

13. Croatia: LELEK – Andromeda

Ah yes, I remember this one from the semi-final. Starts off slowly, gets better. I’ve warmed to it, and I like it. Hopefully it does well.

14. United Kingdom: LOOK MUM NO COMPUTER – Eins, Zwei, Drei

Anyone else spot the irony of our entry being titled in German. It’s the first time I’ve heard this one. Purposely avoided like I do every year. Oh my god, we have absolutely zero chance. A shame, as he came across as being a really nice, if a little eccentric. No chance.

15. France: Monroe – Regarde !

Oh. Opera skills. I probably won’t like this one. And I’m right, I don’t. Decent vocal range, I’ll give her that, butnot even my glass of water, never mind cup of tea. It’s gonna absolutely fly. Hurrah. time for a toilet break.

16. Moldova: Satoshi – Viva, Moldova!

Yep, I liked this one. 100% Eurovision fodder, with the Halo beat, I think at the start. Wonder how Eurovision stands when it comes to clearing samples? Apparently they’re OK with it. Definitely still one of my favourites, and I’m not sure why. If there’s a song I’d play over and over again, it’d be that one.

17. Finland: Linda Lampenius x Pete Parkkonen – Liekinheitin

Apparently, this one is the favourite. Ah yes. This is the one where she got special dispensation to have an instrument playing, and then the entire set burns down or something. Did like this one. Still do. Sort of reminds me of the old Channel 4 Racing theme. I do think this will do well. 20 years since Lordi won Eurovision. I’ve seen them live since then too.

18. Poland: ALICJA – Pray

she swore during the semi-final. I’m going to have to see if I can spot it because I didn’t last time. Didn’t think much of the song last time. Oh yeah, was that a ‘shit’? Not *really* swearing is it? A BBC swear word perhaps. A real-world word. Not a fantastic song. It reminds me of the MC Hammer song of the same name.

19. Lithuania: Lion Ceccah – Sólo Quiero Más

Oh god, it’s Silver Paint guy. He paints himself silver because he comes second in competitions. Didn’t really like this one.

20. Sweden: FELICIA – My System

I really, really liked this one last time, and I’m guessing I will do this time. I always like Sweden’s entries. this one is no exception. Proper Europop at its best. I’ll probably add this one to a Spotify playlist or something. Overall, this is my favourite so far, and I really hope it does well. Probably won’t though because I’ve just given it the kiss of death.

21. Cyprus: Antigoni – JALLA

Oooh, this is catchy. Another one where I might need to find some lightbulbs to screw in while listening to it. 0 points for lyrics, but solid 8/10 for the music. Decent, that one.

22. Italy: Sal Da Vinci – Per Sempre Sì

Upbeat, but romantic, apparently. Ah yes, I remember this one. I didn’t say much about it last time because they’re already through, but… I like this one. It’s another one where the backing track really carries it. Sort of reminds me of when an 80s celebrity would release a single. The instrumental covers the fact that the vocals aren’t the best. But this one, the vocals are actually quite good. I’d like to see it do well

Thankfully, there’s a break at this point, so I made the excuse to go down and get some ‘crisps’. Walkers Oven Baked ready salted, if you’re interested.

23. Norway: JONAS LOVV – YA YA YA

Haven’;t heard this one. Might be catchy. Hmmm, not quite, but I think I can see what would happen if you ordered Freddie Mercury off Temu. Not as good as I was excpecting, but not the worst I’ve heard. Wouldn’t skip it, wouldn;’t play it intentionally.

24. Romania: Alexandra C?pit?nescu – Choke Me

Ohhh. I like this one. Another metal one. Apparently ‘choke’ is in the metaphoric sense, or something, but my word, this one is great. Definitely in my top 3 of the night.

25. Austria: COSMÓ – Tanzschein

The home crowd are going to go nuts for this one, no doubt. There’s one thing I can guarantee, Vienna won’t be hosting it next year. It’s not a great song. the guy looks a little bit like Darragh off The Chase.

And that’s you’re lot. Eurovision oficially over for another year. Only the voting to go now, and all of the crap in the middle that I’ll probably just have in the background while I play Raccoin.

My top three. Sweden, Germany, Romania

this “Waiting for Votes 2 show is much better than anything I’ve seen all night. Not very often I’ll say that, but it was really good this year. Normally it’s just filler, but it seems like there was a bit of effort put in this year.

First vote gone, 0 points.

7 votes down, 1 point. I’ve just noticed Malta have Eddie Hitler on their team.

10 votes… 1 point. Going well so far. Just out of interest, is any of this coming out of the licence fee, seeing as we’re part of the ‘big four’?

Officially half way through, 17 of 35 results… 1 point still.

Well, all of the countries gone… 1 point.

Time for the home viewing. We have absolutely no chance. 0 points last year from the home voting. Can’t see any different this year.

I was right! Last again! I’ll conclude this here. Never EVER doing this shit again… until next year.

Yeah, we came last, as usual, but I don’t mind. Tonight wasa return to a bit of normality after the absolute shit show of last year. 2025 overall was just fucking shit, but the fact that this year returned to some normality meant everything I know I do these every year. I know nobody reads them. Nobody comments. Nobody is reading this now, but things are.. I dunno… stable? Can I put it like that?

Simply The Best… SOUTH CLEVELAND GARAGES!

There are some things about living in Britain that are written into unofficial law. Firstly, if someone drops a glass in a pub, you have to all go “waaaaay”. Secondly, if the weather is anything slightly different than overcast drizzle, you either have to post on Facebook about it, or make generic small-talk to everyone around you.

Thirdly, if you’re from the north east, specifically Teesside, and of a certain age group… Let’s say 35+ at the time of typing, there is one specific unwritten rule that stands to this day.

Whenever “The Best” by Tina Turner comes on the radio, you have to add lyrics. And it goes something like this.

“You’re simply the best…. SOUTH CLEVELAND GARAGES!”

There are clips of nightclubs erupting into song whenever this came on. When the Premier League Darts came to Newcastle, and Mensur Sulevik walked on, a large portion of the crowd also erupted into song.

Anyway, apparently, this particular jingle has been hard to find. And because I’ve typed all of this, you’e already worked out that I’ve found a copy within my own tapes. Therefore, I shall not detay you any longer. Here’s a copy of the advert from around 1999/2000.

It’s funny how just one jingle is probably more fondly remembered than what is on the rest of the tape. For instance, the next song on the tape is “Radio” by The Corrs. I wonder how many people wake up at 4AM in the morning with that going through their head on infinite loop? Nobody. Yet, I’m sure, at some point today, that “The Best” will get played somewhere in Middlesbrough, and 90% of the listenership will add “South Cleveland Garages”.

Also, did you know that “The Best” was originally sung by Bonnie Tyler? And yes, it was me who uploaded the video to Youtube in case anyone thinks I plagarised it for the sake of hits.

Another CD lost to time… or is it?

Well, this is getting embarrassing now. Maybe I’ve just started noticing more of these, but I was in the charity shop just yesterday and I noticed yet another “injket warrior” CD. Good lord, I really need to come up with a better name for those. Any suggestions welcome in the comments. But for new viewers, these are basically bands, or individuals that release their own music on CDRs, before online streaming was a thing, and the disc covers and/or labels were produced on a consumer inkjet printer. I happened to be browsing the Alice House Hospice, in the lovely fishing village of Hartlepool, when this beauty emerged from the rows of bloody Perry Como and Il Divo…

This one instantly piqued my interest, namely “Okus Dolphin – Dark Sirens Of The night” . It was a single. Normally, these type of homebrew ones appear in the charity shops as albums. It also included a club mix of some sort, so it certainly wasn’t going to be your run-of-the-mill country CD or anything like that.

The case wasn’t in the greatest shape, but I could see, lying on the grey plastic tray underneath was my nemesis. A CD with another printed label. Well, how could I resist? Would it play? Under the shop lights it looked fine. No scratches, and no obvious damage. My heart was pounding with excitement, as I threw over a shiny pound coin to the shopkeep, who, before my interruption was carefully sticking coat hangers inside ladies’ clothers.

33p later, I took it home, went out for a few bevvies, came home and was excited to listen to it. I pressed play… My heart sank. There was the all-to-familiar audio crackle that proves, once again, the bloody CD label has ruined this otherwise perfect CD. I was gutted. I listened to track 1 through the crackles, namely “Dark Sirens Of The Night”. A catchy little number. No idea of the lyrics, or what it was about, but I really quite liked it (turns out the lyrics are printed on the inside ofn the sleeve… a nice touch!). A couple more plays… nope, no better.

Sadly, another one I didn’t get to in time.

As you can see from the disk, something odd appears. You can see the original branding of the CDR showing through. Not something I’ve noticed with other ruined CDs, but, yes, there are also the telltale black spots showing, and maybe it’s just the light in that photo, but the dye seems a little discoloured too. Thanks to the damage, I can see this was a “Master” branded CD-R, wich I believe were sold exclusively in Staples.

I wasn’t intending doing a write-up of this disk until much later, but then I noticed that Okus Dolphin was active on Twitter (it’s not X, it never will be X), 21 MINUTES before I listened to the CD… considering this disk is now 23 years old, I didn’t expect that.

Turns out, this is the first case where a ruined disc isn’t lost media! Apparently, all of the tracks are available on Spotify, thanks to an album dated 2008

There’s a demo version of “Dark Sirens Of The Mind” on there too, but it also seems the tape was used as a multitrack or a drum loop too, so it’s pretty unlistenable.

Overall, it’s a shame the CD didn’t survive, but I’m over the moon that I’d discovered a catchy, original song I actually like. I don’t expect that to happen too often during this journey.

If only I could travel back in time 20 years

I wish I had a time machine. there’s only one thing that’s starting to come to light now, and to be perfectly honest, I’m the only person who probably knows about it. As you know, I’m a music lover. I’m done with trawling the charity shops for good CDs though. Now I trawl the charity shops for obscure CDs.

You know the type. A local band, usually consisting of a few ex-school friends or work colleagues. They get together and form a band. They record some tracks, they burn a few copies, print out a lovely case, and even stick a fancy paper label on there using one of the many, many CD labelling kits around at the time. They give some to their mates, maybe give some away at gigs when they do something at their local pub.

They eventually drift apart, and the bands get forgotten about. These burned CDs occasionally end up in charity shops, and I happily hoover them up. I’ve found some absolute pearlers of songs amongst them, some of which I intend to go through and document here in the future.

Anyway, that’s a story for another post. What I’m writing about here is that a lot of these CDs are now sadly unplayable.

Remember a few lines above where I mentioned that the bands / individuals will stick labels on the disks to make them look nice? Well, it seems those lovely labels are robbing future listeners of the opportunity to hear their music.

I, thankfully, haven’t found too many examples of this over time, but I know I’m going to find more, and it means that some songs are lost forever. No matter how small a band is or however long they’ve lasted, if they liked their music enough to put it onto record it, put it on a CDR and distribute it to a few people, then it simply deserves to be listened to by future generations… or, me.

Anyway, this all came about several years ago. I found a CD in a charity shop. It was a home-burned one, meaning it was all inkjet printed. They say you can’t judge a book by its cover, but you can certainly do this with CDs. I wanted to hear this.

The CD had one of those Inkjet label maker things on it. They were in every staionery store throughought the land in the 2000s. I put the CD in, attempted to rip it, and “nothing”. Or rather, It did eventually rip, but my CD drive sounded like it was having a nervous breakdown, and must have took an hour. I attempted to play it, but the sound was completely garbled. If you loaded it into Audacity, you could see the shape of a song there, but zoom in and the whole thing resembled a square wave. I tried this particular disc on many CD players. It was able to recognise it as a CD (the table of contents is stored in a very small area, only a few bytes at the beginning of the disc) but playing any of the tracks was a complete failure.

This CD was by a band called “Beckett”, and for all I know, this could have been the only copy ever produced, and now it’s gone for good. There are plenty of bands out there with the same name, but none of them appear to have the same tracklisting as what this CD contained.

Anyway, Last Saturday, I was in a charity shop, and picked up this.

It’s called “What’s In A Box” by a band called “Serving Suggestion”, released in 2002. It was 99p, and factory sealed. Enough for me to take a punt on it. Fast forward 8 days, I rip the cellophane off. I hope the image above just shows how pristine this thing was. Also, note that there’s none of your inkjet muck here. The case was professionally designed and printed.

The actual design of the case is clever. The disk was printed like a pizza…

Lift the CD out, and the underside of the inlay had a greasy mark printed, where the CD sat. It actually gave me a giggle.

I slapped the CD in, expecting to be greeted with some South African early 2000s indie tunes. After a minute or so, I got nothing. I took the CD out and examined it. From the naked eye, it looks absolutely pristine, after never being played before…

Ignore the dust, my phone loves picking up stuff like that. After a quick wipe, there was nay a mark to be seen, but I couldn’t be arsed reuploading the photo.

I turned the disk over, and realised that yes, this bloody disk had a paper label. It wasn’t apparent at first, as this was a nicely presented CD, but the scientific method of trying to lift it with my nail proved once and for all at this was, indded a paper label…

And, if you view the data portion in just the right light, you can see the issue… the bit where the data is stored has taken on a leapord-skin appearance, and is no longer a uniform shade.

It’s especially prominent to the left of the image, with that leapord-skin blotching. You can see where the lighter data section clearly had dark blobs on it. I can only assume that, over time, the glue on the label has reacted with either the dye on the disk, or the foil layer, or a combination of both. It’s sort-of like a “modern day” equivalent of the CD Bronzing fiasco that happened in the late 80s / early 90s. I don’t expect for this post to actually resonate with anyone, but I know there will be millions of people out there that will have used these CD labels and have precious memories stored on CDRs. Maybe it’s time to download the data from them before they all rot.

EDIT: I did try this disc on another machine, with different software,in the vain hope it’ll make any difference. Unfortunately, it didn’t. I’ll probably end up just binning this CD, but all is not lost. I’ve scanned all of the artwork in, and there’s a Discogs entry for this particular disc, and the artwork isn;t very good, so I’ll replace mine with that one. the case will go on to replace a damaged case.

Ghosts of Christmas Presents -1991

This was a special year for me. I was the lucky recipient of not one, but two major presents this year. It’s also bittersweet, as we didn’t know it at the time, but it was also the last Christmas where we would all be a family. Anyway, the two big prezzies this year were my first proper hi-fi, and a Commodore 64.

1991 was the year that I first started collecting music properly. My dad used to install and fix TVs for a well-known rental company. Every so often, he would get some old electronics that a previous owner was going to get rid of. In the summer of 1991, he brought home an old cast-ff music centre from the 70s. I had clearly shown my interest in music at the time, so this was given to me, and it stayed in my room. Just like the tape player a couple of years before, I got some old hand-me-down records from my dad, and I’d play them all the time.

In August 1991, I bought my first ever record to play on it, ‘Secret Garden’ by T’Pau.

It was clear though that this needed an upgrade. It sounded horrible, and it probably took a small power station to run it. So, with the music bug now firmly implanted in my brain, and a small stack of records to call my own, I asked Santa for a new Hi-fi.

Thankfully, he provided, once again somehow managing to squeeze this massive box down our then newly-built chimney. And here’s me, Xmas day 1991 with the hi-fi in the big box behind me.

And here it is, in all its glory.

I’ve talked about the hi-fi on here before, so I won’t go too in-depth. It had the ‘Alba’ badge on it, and anyone who recognises this name will know that it was built on a budget, shall we say. Still ,it worked, and I absolutely loved it. My first big hifi, and one with a record player that didn’t sound like someone eating a bag of crisps through a mattress. It consisted of a record player, digital radio (which wasn’t exactly digital – you still changed frequency by an analogue wheel, but the output appeared on a red 7-segment display), a graphic equaliser (fancy!) and two tape decks (count ’em”) No CD player, but there was space for one, with phono inputs on the back.

As I said, I didn’t really have a big record collection at the time. My pocket money never really stretched far enough for albums, so they were mainly just singles. As was tradition at the time, we went over to see my late aunty Linda, who kindly offered to loan me some of her old singles. It was the first time I’d heard of some of these songs, namely “Moonlight Shadow” by Mike Oldfield, “Total Eclipse Of The Heart” by Bonnie Tyler, and who could forget “Shaddap You Face” by Joe Dolce. All new songs to me on that very day! This started my rrecod collecting off en earnest. I’m pretty sure I got some records off a relative at a later date, the majority of those I still have.

Oh yes, I forgot to mention. I gone one tape with the hi-fi. I believe this was from my cousin Julie. A copy of “Now That’s What I Call Music! 20”. I loved this album, and it still remails my gavourite Now album. To be honest, I think everyone’s first Niw album is their favourite, but this one has such an ecletic mix of songs, it’s hard to put it into words. I still have the tapes, and in fact, I managed to pick it up on CD earlier this year.

And onto the Commodore 64. It was a machine that had been out for 9 years this point. Every few years, they’d ‘revamp’ it, and try to make it relevant again. O believe this one was one of the last versions released before it was discontinued.

It came with 4 games on one ROM cartridge. Flimbo’s Quest, Klax, Fiendish Freddy’s Big Top O’Fun and… International Soccer, I believe.

I instantly took a shine to Klax. A puzzler, a bit like Tetris, where blocks come at you from a conveyor belt. You have to drop them into a hopper below, then rearrange them to make matches of 3, 4 or 5, causing them to disappear. You can only hold 5 on your paddle at one time, so it’s a clever balancing act of getting blocks you want to make a line, holding on for ones until later, and making sure no blocks fall over the edge. Drop three over the edge, and the game’s over. This was colourful, and fun to play. I still fire the arcade version up in MAME every so often.

Flimbo’s Quest was a revelation to me. It was the first time I’d heard the SID chip in action. After growing up with a ZX Spectrum with nothing more than a tinny beeper, it was a world apart. The title screen music still remains one of my favourite bits of computer music to this day.

Fiendish Freddy’s big top o’ Fun wasn’t exactly fun. It was more of an act of frustration than an actual game. Compete in events such as diving into a pool of water, but the pool gets smaller each time. You have to guide the diver left and right and fire just as you’re getting close to the water. That was just one of about 6 or 7 events. Think ‘Daley Thompson’s Decathlon’ but set in a circus. It wasn’t great.

The least memorable was “International Soccer”. A very basic football game, with chunky graphics and barely any gameplay to think or. It certainy didn’t push the machine to its limits, however small they may have been. It was as if there was only a small abount of ROM left, so they just threw in any old crap from the archives. 2 great games, one mediocre, and one space-filler. Apparently, it also came with “Tau Ceti” on tape for some reason, a game that I never quite got my head around.

Despite the limitations of the C64 at this time, I did enjoy it. I ended up getting quite a few games, mainly off covertapes and budget releases.

At some point, either later that year, or early the next, we got another C64, mainly because it had the 1541 disk drive advertised with it, and an absolute shed-ton of floppy disks. I don’t think I got to the end of exploring the disks when that C64 died. It would just show an unsynched black screen. Apparently this was a common failure in the old C64s and usually just needed an IC replacing, but still, I had the new one. The old one did eventually get repaired again, but it wasn’t lokg before it blew another IC, and this time it was curtains. The local computer shop had stopped repairing them, and the internet didn’t exist back then (not to me, anyway), so getting it fixed was also impossible.

The newer C64 soldiered on for a while longer before it developed a keyboard fault, with two columns of keys not working. I did open it up and try and fix it, just in case it was the ribbon cable or something, but alas not. I have no idea what happened to that C64. I don’t think I kept it. I wish I had though, it’d probably be fun to get the old hardware out and give it a blast again.

The ‘unknown song’ has been identified!

For those of you who’ve been following this blog and/or my life in general, you know I’ve been after a certain piece of music for nigh on 25 years. It was used in a local radio phone-in show called “Tom’s Talk-in”, hosted by Tom Davies. After adverts and various other breaks in the show, he would use several pieces of music, edited down to become short instrumentals, aka music ‘beds’.

About 20 clips were used at the time, including a remix of Gabrielle’s “Dreams” which you could only find on the CD single, and “Downtown” by One 2 Many. Over the course of the show, I pretty much found out what all of the songs he used were, but one particular clip remained elusive.

Going through some old tapes many years ago, I found a clip of it. I asked if anyone knew it. A 16 second clip is all I had to go by.

Many people have said they’d heard it, but all drew a blank. I even asked on Usenet back in the day, and while there were plenty of suggestions, not one proved helpful.

I rang the show and asked Tom himself. I think he cut me off. For some reason, he didn’t like people asking about his music beds, as if they were a big secret. I even asked my mate Chris to ring in and ask, to see if he could catch Tom in a better mood. Nope. His response essentially was “No you can’t buy it. It was written for the show, and it doesn’t have a name”. I began to think it really was written for the show. Maybe Richard Kell, his sound engineer, had knocked it up in his spare time?

Eventually, Tom’s Talk-in disappeared off the airwaves, and I thought the song was gone forever. At some point, I happened to catch a few seconds of the kids’ telly programme ‘Grange Hill’, and I could have sworn I heard it on a radio during a scene, with female vocals.

That, to me, meant it had to be a proper, commercially released song. Surely someone would be able to identify it? Turns out my assumption was entirely wrong, but more on that later.

It also proved that Tom may have lied about it being especially written for the show. Just hearing this meant that I’d have this obsession for nigh-on 25 years.

Many posts on here about it proved to be no help. Now, the days before Shazam was a phone app, it used to be a premium rate line. You call the number, hole the phone up to the music, and it sent you a text. Well, this was my first, of many also positives from there. Unfortunately, it’s not perfect, and would often throw up a random song that might have a similar beat. Usually, these have a small amount of identifications, (shazams) normally in single or double figures, but I’d humour it by checking. “It’s Good but it’s not the one”, as Roy Walker would say.

Every so often, I’d ask on Twitter (I refuse to call it X) or Facebook, and the same story as before. Someone will have heard it, but no idea what it was. Back to square one. Every time I played it, I’d give it a few cycles through Shazam.

I even uploaded it a couple of times to the website “WatZatSong”. A community ran website, where you upload a song, and other members help you identify it. Nothing. Nada. Zip. Zilch. With every day that passed, I’d believe more and more that it really was just written for the show, and maybe my identification on Grange Hill was incorrect.

Tom’s Talk-in returned to the airwaves a couple more times. Unfortunately, while he did revive a few music beds from back in the day, this one was lost to time. Tom Davies, the presenter, was found in possession of indecent images, and died just a few days before his sentencing

And that, the only glimmer of hope, disappeared. Tom was dead, and so was my chance of ever finding this track.

Every so often, I’d revisit it. Run a shazam, search blankly for the result, only to find out it was incorrect. I was used to this by now.

A day or two ago, I got a notification on “WatZatSong”. Somebody had started following my post. They didn’t help identify it, but seeing as I was on the page, I played the track, and ran Shazam on it one more time.

Up came another track. This one only had 15 shazams. This is never a good sign, as mentioned previously. It was nearing bedtime, so once again, I’d humour it, especially as it appeared on a Bruton library CD. These are notoriously difficult to find clips online. Eventually, I tracked it down on the Universal Music website.

I clicked play. My heart didn’t so much skip a beat, as pop out of my chest and go sliding along the keyboard. THERE IT WAS. It even had the female vocals on it. Oh my god. I’ve never felt an adrenalin rush like it. I reached for my phone and texted Chris.

I just had to tell someone, and he’d been with me since the very start.

You’ll be unsurprised to hear that he didn’t know what the hell I was on about, until I’d calmed down and explained everything in a bit more detail.

So, dear reader, you’ve made it through several paragraphs of crap that means nothing to anyone but me. I’m guessing you’re dying to hear it in its entirety? Well, here you go.

It’s entitled “Where Has It Gone 2” by Phil Nicholas.

Here it is, the proper version. Thanks Glen.

This link works at the time of typing, but it’s bound to disappear in a year or two… So no doubt you’ll be asking yourself, “Where Has It Gone?”….

Ahem. Sorry about that.

And that’s it. I’ve taken a few things from this. Firstly, I led everyone on a bit of a wild goose chase, thinking it was commercially released. It wasn’t. Library CDs are only ever released to production companies, often in bulk.

Of course, it made perfect sense that a low-budget children’s TV programme such as Grange Hill would use library music for their “radio music” as it’s considerably cheaper than real, commercially released songs.

As for Tom’s Talk-in, it seems very out of place for a piece of library music to be used. Maybe Richard or Tom heard it, liked it and used it? I will never know.

Here ends a portion of my life that has gone on for longer than most of the people I work with have been alive. Despite what happened in his later years, I’ll always remember Tom as the grumpy, sarcastic phone in host with a great taste in music.

This was the last “unknown” song. I will never spend almost 30 years looking for a piece of music again.

EDIT: Many thanks to Glen for posting a link to the correct version on Roblox. I don’t even know what a Roblox is!

EDIT 2: Glen also provided a link to the artist’s Linkedin page that happens to have an email on there. I’ve dropped him an email , and hopefully he’ll get back to me, mainly just to say thanks.

EDIT 3: Fixed the link to the news on Tom Davies. Not that it really matters at this point.

EDIT 4: A bit late now, but it’s finally appeared on YouTube. It’s not on any official channel, so I expect this may disappear at any point, but at least, for now, enjoy what is still one of my favourite pieces of music…

Eurosong Fever 2023!

UPDATE: A server move has corrupted this post somewhat – the encoding has changed the foreign characters to a bunch of symbols…. grrr. One day I might fix it. Probably not.)

Oh yes. It’s that time of year again. It’s Eurovision 2023! Join me, as I go through the runners and riders, criticise their songs, and generally make fun of the entire thing. It’s going to be great! Now, this is going to be in realtime, so please refresh this page (F5) to get the latest version.

Right, so it’s started now. And it all starts off with a “special” version of last years’ Ukraine entry. Some video inserts, and now they’re ‘performing’ it live at the venue. I wonder how long it’s going to go on for, because so far it’s felt like 2 hours, and we’ve not even started yet. Oh, there’s a flag parade. I think this might be the best time for me to go and get some beer.

Austria: Teya & Salena – Who The Hell Is Edgar?

Oh god, yeah, this one is going to do well. It was in the semi-finals and everyone loved it. Po po po po pooooo. I remember quite liking it. I think it’ll do well because it’s pretty damn catchy. Will it win? Never more. Not sure what that whole 0.003 bit was about.

Portugal: Mimicat РAi Cora̤̣o.

No song has won from position number two. this one starts off like “I Will Survive”. I remember this one sort-of having a Tetris vibe to it. I didn’t think it’d get through to the final, but it did, despite some of the much better numbers such as Ireland going home. That was a surprise. Below is the running order, which I’m gojng to fill in as it goes, naturally. It’s just making things easier for me. Doing this now, because this song is entirely forgettable, and I don’t think it’s going to get anywhere….

Switzerland: Remo Forrer – Watergun

I really dislike this one. Something about not wanting to be a soldier, and instead, playing with water guns. Slooooooow. Not a fan. It’s going to do well, because it’s about war.

Poland: Blanka – Solo

Apparently, it’s catchy. Let’s hope so. It’s like Ace of Base. In a way. It’s OK. Infinitely better than the last trash. It’s going to bug me though, because there’s a bit that sounds like another song and I can’t think what. It’ll come to me at some point tonight. Yeah, that one’s alright. It’s grown on me since I heard it in the semi-final Hope it does well. My fave of the night so far.

Serbia: Luke Black – Samo Mi Se Spava

I didn’t like this one, but the crowd seemed to love it. Not catchy at all. It’s one of those songs that wants to be something that it isn’t. Absolutely no memorable quality, except maybe that “Hello” but. and that’s literally it.

France: La Zarra – Évidemment

Ahh, now, one of the first that I haven’t heard before properly. Oh, god, can it get any slower? Ah, there we go. It’s licked in quite a lot. That first 30 seonds was dire. It’s not bad. No idea what she’s singing about, because it’s entirely in French. It’s probably about double glazing or something. Yeah, there’s definitely been worse. Not catchy, but the crowd are loving it.

Now there’s a recap of some of the interval acts from the sem-finals. Most of which I fast forwareded at the time, so I have absolutely no idea. Thankfully, I haven’t missed much. Apart from Dustin The turkey. Who remembers him?

Cyprus: Andrew Lambrou – Break A Broken Heart

Best intro so far. Downhill after three seconds though. Ohhh, it’s one of those that’s going to go either way. It’s either going to be great and actually kick off, or it’s just going to sit around and do nothing for three minutes. Yeah, this one’s OK. Not going to queue and get the CD for it, but it’s not going to make me run somewhere and kick the radio off the wall. Have a feeling it’ll do well.

Spain: Blanca Paloma – Eaea

Another one of the “Big Five” that didn’t have to go through the semi-final stage, so I have no idea what this one sounds like. I’ve heard rumours that it’s supposed to be good, though.

Well, this one wasn’t worth waiting for. Sounds like they’re playing the backing track to the wrong songs. Sounds like she’s in pain, poor lass. this isn’t going to do amazing.

Sweden: Loreen – Tattoo

I remember her microphone sounded weird in the semi-finals. She was wearing one of those jaw mics, and it didn’t sound good at all. Well, it still sounded the name, so maybe it’s meant to be like that? The song itself isn’t bad. Apparently, it’s been streamed 55,000,000 times. It’s written by one of the members of Amaranthe, so that might have had something to do with the reason why it’s so popular. It’s going to do well.

Albania: Albina & Familja Kelmendi – Duje

You’re only allowed 6 memembers on stage, and they’re all the same family. It’s… Well, I’d nortmally say it’s different, but there;’s no such thing as that in Eurovision. In fact, Spain also started with that screaming stuff. Dance moves with hankies. Yup. That’s Eurovision for you. Forgettable. When the song finishes, it will never sweep through my brain again. Definitely a bottom halfer.

Italy: Marco Mengoni – Due Vite

He’s a big star in Italy, apparently. Again, the first time I’ve heard this one, and, yeah. It’s alright, if a little slow. It’s in Italian, so I have no idea what he’s on about. Prima la musica? I love music? Does that mean I can speak Italian now? Scorchio! It’ll probably do well.

Estonia: Alika – Bridges

Oh yes. I think Tom showed me this one. It’s a piano that played itself. I tried to look for the floppy drive on it, but couldn’t see it. I remember seeing one of those automatic pianos with a floppy drive on it. No sign of it though. Where the maker’s mark shiould be, it says “Estonia”. Nice touch. I quite like this one, in a “It’s better than the majority” vibe. Yes, I do actually like this one. Hope it does well.

Finland: Käärijä – Cha Cha Cha

Apparently, the dancers to a ‘human caterpillar’ dance move. Interesting I’m sure. Well, this is all about the stage performance. Oh, wait. Not quite the human caterpillar I thought he was referring to. The crowd absolutely love this one, and I have to admit, it’s catchy. It’s be very surprised if this wasn’t top 3. it’s 100% Eurovision

Czechia: Vesna – My Sister’s Crown

‘We’re not Your Dolls’, apparently. Oh, go away. I like the little flute sample in the background. I’m not sure what the song is about. Porbabbly something about GURL POWER. I think I’d like an instrumental version of this. Impressive ponytails though, if they’re real. I like the music, not the song.

Australia: Voyager – Promise

Yeah, this one’s actually quite good. Rocky, synthy vibe. this one’s great. I think Jamie S would actually like this one. I’d probably say this one’s my favourite of the nights. It’s the one I’ve not had to think about liking. If you’ve ever heard ‘Beast In Black’, it reminds me of them in a way. Synthy rock. this is right up my flagpole. I’d love to see this do very well.

Belgium: Gustaph – Because Of You

Well, the crowd like it, and it’s pretty upbeat. this is your typical Eurovision fodder. If you typed “Write me a Eurovision Entry” into ChatGPT, this is the type of stuff it’d come up with. I can’t help but think it’s completely, and utterly forgettable in every way, shape and form., but no, I do remember this one from the semi-finals, so that’s got to mean something.

Armenia: Brunette – Future Lover

I didn’t like this one at all in the semi-finals. It just seems tuneless, especially compared to the previous song. Admittedly, I like it a little more than I did in the semi-finals, but I doin’t think it’s going to do well. That’ll probably mean it’ll win, then.

Moldova: Pasha Parfeni – Soarele ÅŸi Luna

This is just weird. There’s a dwarf, named Sergio, playing a Moldovan flute or something (a Caval, apparently). 15/10 for the stange perfornace…. 8 out of 10 for the song. I’d like this to do well because it’s had the best staging of the night so far.

Ukraine: TVORCHI – Heart of Steel

Apparently, their name means “Creative” in Ukranian. Every day’s a school day. again, another one I haven’t heard. this year’s slightly different, because I watched the semi-final for the first time. I’ve never done that before, so some of the songs I’ve heard, but there are six that I haven’t. Well, I can quite honestly say, they’re not winning any votes this year.

Norway: Alessandra – Queen of Kings

This was the first one I heard in the semi-finals and I really, really liked it. Really catchy tune, and again, another Eurovision staple. Reminds me very much of “Wolves of the Sea” from a few years ago. It sounds like a ‘GURL POWERZ’ type song, but it’s catchy enough for me to still like it.

For the record… Wolves of the Sea was the Latvian entry at the Eurovision Song Contest 2008 in Belgrade performed by the group Pirates of the Sea. It qualified from the second semifinal in 6th place. In the final, it was performed 10th following Belarus and preceding Croatia. At the close of voting, it finished in 12th place with 83 points.

Germany: Lord of the Lost – Blood & Glitter

Ohhhh, this one’s supposed to be the winner. I haven’t heard it, but just by the looks of them, it looks like it should be right up my strasse. Hahaha. Yes, this is amazing. Over-the-top costumes, metal with a buried piano. It’s like Lordi are back. There’s a screamy bit too. If I needed a reason to run out and buy the soundstrack, it’s this, Norway, and Australia. Graham Norton hated it. Brilliant!

Lithuania: Monika LinkytÄ— – Stay

Oh yes. I’m sure Tom at work kicked off about this one because she appeared back in 2015 with essentially the same song. I just nodded and agreed. I was just excited that I had someone to talk about Eurovision with, even if it was for a brielf 10 minutes. Yes, I like this one, even if it does allegedly sound like a previous entry. Anthemic? Is that the right word? Don’t know. It does start off a bit slow, but that chorus sticks with you.

Israel: Noa Kirel – Unicorn

I heard something about this one being popular. Apparently she’s really big in Isreal. The song is not amazing. I think this one is all about the dancing Phew. Not sure that’d come across well on the CD though. Not quite sure what the power of a unicorn is… Fart rainbows? Admittedly, I don’t think I blinked during the entire time of that dance.

Slovenia: Joker Out – Carpe Diem

very generic. the crowd were clapping away to it, which is usually a good sign that it’ll do well. It’s on the acceptable side of generic though. Yeah, go on then, I quite like it. there, I said it. The beer must be taking effect. Singer looks like him out of China Crisis.

Croatia: Let 3 – Mama Å ÄŒ!

Oh, they’re doing a video of Whitby in the build-up. Apparently, these are going to be Croatia’s version of Monty Python. And if they win, they’re going to perform their reprise completely naked. There’s not going to be any chance of that happens. If they win, I’ll run over to Liverpool in the break, get up and join them completely naked. This is dire. I can hear the word ‘syncophant’. Or something like that, and that’s all I can understand. the crowd loved it? No accountinfg for taste.

United Kingdom: Mae Muller – I Wrote A Song

the last song of the night. Another one I haven’t heard. Well, not fully. As tradition, I try to avoid our songs until this very moment. Well, it’s catchy, I’ll give it that. Whether it’s enough to save it from the middle / bottom half of the table, I don’t think so. I wonder what they do with all of these custom LED panels when the show’s finished. It’s a shame that it’s all over for another year. It’s a shame that my original plans for the night fell through, but at least I’ve got to spend it with both of my readers. I’ll be back on when the otes start. I’m not going anywhere.

After the jury votes, we’re…. not doing well, but Germany are doing worse. I’m very surprised. I liked that song.

And the next update will be the final score…. apart from this one… It’s cormed we’ve finished 2nd last underneath Germany. Oh well.

And here’s your final score.

I enjoyed every second of that. Already looking forward to next year. And that concludes this blog post. Same time next year?