Ah yes, here it is again. Eurovision 2026! The annual political bunfight set around a song contect. I look forward to it every year. Well, except for last year. things weren’t going to well for me this time last year, so I decided to take a break. Over the course of the next three days, I intend to double my post total on here for the entire year, with the semi-finals and final on Saturday. I’ll probably watch them all, type my feelings towards them then burn myself completely and vow to never do this again until next year.
Now, unfortunately, I’ve been a bit busy tonight, so I’m a bit behind and watching it on catchup, so if you’re reading this in realtime, then I’ll be typing about things that happenmed 30/35 minutes ago. I’m sure that’s all tradition too. Anyhoo.
So it’s starting off with Vicky Leandross. Apparently she won it.
Moldova: Satoshi / Viva, Moldova!
Oooh, flutey, and that drum beat… the Amen riff, or something? Moldova is on duty… Not a bad start, actually. I quite like this one. A good start.
Sweden: FELICIA / My System
Apparently, this is going to be one of the favourites. She’s never appeared without her mask… Oooooh, dancy. This has never been known. two songs in and I actually like both of them.
Croatia: LELEK / Andromeda
Well, this one;s starting slowly. And it didn’t get better. I knew we couldn’t go three for three. Mind you, it did get a bit better towards the end. It’ll get through.
Greece: Akylas / Ferto
Why… why is he dressed up like a tiger?. You need to see this one to believe it. Retro graphics. I’m getting sick of seeing those new. they’re overused. Worst song, but I ended up quite liking the staging. No chance of coming close.
Portugal: Bandidos do Cante / Rosa
It’s taken… is that 5 or 6 sonds before they’ve got to the sloppy ones. Absolutely nothing to this one, and considering it’s in Portuguese, I have no idea what’s being sung. Not even much of a backing track to like… I think it’ll do well.
Georgia: Bzikebi / On Replay
Lots of lalalalalalalala, in this one. One of the female singers sounded a bit of tune on this one. Not one of my favourites so far, but perfect Eurovision fodder.
Oh, here’s a bonus one. Italy. they’re already through so they weren’t on the website’s list.
Finland: Linda Lampenius x Pete Parkkonen / Liekinheitin
Apparently this is one of the favourites to win. Didn’t know that live instruments are to be played on stage, apparently, ‘Linda’ had special dispensation to play the violin. Oooh, I can see why this is is one of the favourites. Oh, great, now the set’s on fire. Yeah, that’s definitely going through.
Montenegro: Tamara Živkovic / Nova Zora
This one’s the closest to metal so far. Normally there’s a few in there, but…. er, so rry, I got slightly distracted by some lovely bottoms there. Cough. I expected to see some vampire fangs or something there. It’ll go through
Estonia: Vanilla Ninja / Too Epic To Be True
Apparently they’re called that because they make ice cream. No, seriously. YES! this is what I watch Eurovision for. Guitars. this belongs in the 90s, and it’s my favourite by far. Sounds like it’s fallen out of 1991.
Israel: Noam Bettan / Michelle
Ah, here we go. this is where all of the politics are going. Wouldn’t be surprised if we see a protest here. Well, you can hear someone shouting in the background. the song isn’t that great if I’m completely honest.
And now Germany. there are already through so I’ll leave my opinion to the final.
Belgium: ESSYLA / Dancing on the Ice
My god. I’m not quite sure what this one is supposed to be. No sir, don’t like it. Seems to be the same line repeated over and over. I might count next time it’s on how matimes she sings “keep dancing on the ice”.
Lithuania: Lion Ceccah / Sólo Quiero Más
Oh. Silver paint. Now that’s a gimmick. Apparently he’s had the silver make-up on all day. the song itself appears to be very forgettable. Certainly one I’ll not remember in 10 minutes time. It’ll probably go through.
San Marino: SENHIT / Superstar
Featuring Boy George. No, really. the song itself is very generic, I don’t even think Mr. O’Dowd can save this one. I was right, but even more Eurovisiony than the rest of them.
Poland: ALICJA / Pray
Wow. I’m glad this is nearly over. Only one mopre song, and they’ve seemingly been getting worse as the last few songs have been chronic. Apparently she swore in that song too. Never noticed.
Serbia: LAVINA / Kraj Mene
Oooh, a metal song. This one might be good. Ah yes. there’s the pointy leather outfits. And yep, it’s certainly metal. Phew. This one’s saved the last few songs. It’s even got a bit shouty.
And that’s your lot. the only thing left is the voting. I think I can fast forward most of this, might even be able to catch up.
Apparently, there’s a musical act in the middle. “Zurcaroh – Welcome To The Funfar”. Lots of acrobats. Aaaand I’m bored of it.
I’ve also caught up now so I’m watching this live…
Greece. The tiger bloke is through.
Finland. Yeah, they were guarartneed to go through anyway.
Belgium.
Sweden. Liked that one. Glad it went through.
Moldova. Ha. That was a weird one. Had a feeling it’d go through.
Israel. Oh. Saturday night’s going to be fun, then.
Serbia. Yaaay. A bit of metal.
Croatia. Oh, that was the folky one. Wasn’t sure if that’d go through.
Lithuania. Silver paint guy. Can’t remember anything about the song.
Poland. Didn’t like that one.
Right, well, that’s that, then. I get to do this all again on Thursday!

















