THE END: Ah well, that’s that all over with for another four years. This blog probably won’t be here by the time the next one comes along. I hope you’ve enjoyed this post. Good luck to the lucky git who won the sweepstake at work.

Normal programming will resume shortly, and thankfully, normal programming on TV will resume also. Except that Top Gear is very, very late.

Full time, for real this time: YAY WELL DONE SPAIN. Now get Top Gear on.

26:00: Goooooooooooooooal to Span. Iniesta. Forever. Booked for taking his shirt off. Tee hee.

Half Extra time Looks like it’s gonna be penners…

100:46 One of the guys in the blue football suits almost scored. But didn’t.

92:48 Some of the LED advertising hoardings have white dots where there shouldn’t be white dots. The sound also died temporarily on the Beeb.

90:00 Kick off. Again. Top gear delay inevitable. Sigh.

Full Time: Well, this is the 2nd World Cup final to finish 0-0. The other was in 1994.

86:59: Please don’t say this is going to delay Top Gear…

78:16: Can see this going to extra time. Oh…. joy.

69:15: Oooooh, unlucky Spain

66:13: Yet another yellow card. Currently, I’m eating some roast beef slices which have been in the fridge since the beginning of time. They appear to have the same taste as the plastic they’re wrapped in. Larvely.

62:45: “There is something brewing in this world cup final”…. Yeah, sorry, that’ll be last night’s madras…

45:00: Why does everyone keep missing that bloody octopus? He’s been lucky. Seven times.

Half Time: Well, that was predicably dull. It says something when you’d rather prick about deleting spam than watching the match.

39:56 I’ve just noticed that the light and dark stripes on the pitch line up exactly with the markings. I wonder if they’re used to help calculate the “distance from goal” captions when there’sa free kick? Tsk. I remember when they were purely decorative.

35:00 Well, there wasn’t a goal. Maybe it only workds if I leave the keyboard to go to the toilet?

32:10 I’m going to put some stuff in the bin out of the back. There will be a goal.

27:18: They’re still kicking a ball around. On 9th July, someone searched for “juicey n wet pussys” on this site. One of the orange guys just did a karate kick to the chest of one of the blue guys. Best moment so far.

23:20: I’ve turned my intentions to clearing some of the spam entries out of the stats database, as it’s absolutely huge at the moment, and it could do with a bit of a clean up. this may, or may not slow the site down to a crawl.

16:06: Two yellow cards already. Dirty match.

10:45: Every time I hear “Iniesta”, I always have to add, “For ever, come on and sing my song…. ALLL NIIIGHT LONG”.

07:30: Wow, look at all of those cameras behind the net!

05:22: Ah, the blue ones must be Spain. I do like BBC’s colour coded scoreboard.

04:27: Oooooh, them in the blue nearly scored.

03:45: I’ve just spammed Glen’s forum with a link to this page. I’m such a naughty boy, but hello if you’re reading from there anyway.

01:08: A free kick already. I have a feeling this match is going to be incredibly dull

Kick off: They’ve kicked off.

Random Thought: 4 years ago, I was on my first laptop, typing my thoughts into Glen’s forum because this site used Blogger, and I couldn’t update it in realtime. That laptop had no wireless built in. I believe I was connected via a 15-metre ethernet cable trailling all of the way upstairs. How times and technology have changed. I’m watching this footy in HD. I also dreamt that a pop group I’ve never heard of were firing fireworks at me and Gregg (who I’ve not seen for years, by the way), as we walked up Horseley Place. That dream was about as pointless as this match is going to be.

National Anthems: Bollocks to this, I’muted the telly, and am playing the video below and singing along. It’s awesome. Tinny laptop speakers don’t do it justice.

They’re walking on the pitch: I LOVE this music, it’s called “Fifa Anthem”, don’t you know.

Buildup 3: Jesus, what time is kick off? I’m sick of listening to ex-footballers rabbiting on about tactics and “dragging people out of the box”. Apparently, the Germans are marked. I hope they had a shower before they go on the pitch. Oh, it’s so warm in here. I’m going upstairs for a wash.

Buildup 2: You know, I didn’t even know who was playing? I just added a “uaregay” tag, which was supposed to be a parody of “Uruguay”. It’s Spain v Netherlands. Wow. I just realised how much I really don’t care! Did I mention I’m not drinking any beer for this? I only got up at 6PM. More BBC footage I’m afraid. I can’t hear Jonathan Thingy’s voice without thinking “Robot Wars”.

Buildup 1: Right, I wish they’d just get on with it. BBC are currently just showing endless video footage. Oddly, the match is also on ITV. Following ITV’s track record of abysmal coverage (see England’s goal missed), I won’t be touching them with a bargepole. I can’t remember if the last world cup final had coverage on two channels. I’ll probably switch over if BBC have Mick “Vuvuzela” McCarthy doing the commentrary.