Wow, I can’t believe how much writers block I have at the minute…

Well, as promised, I got up stupidly early to go and witness the opening of the new Lidl store. I awoke, at 7:30, with the sound of my mobile alarm walking me up. I can’t believe I actually bothered to set my alarm for something like this.

After slapping a manky t-shirt and trousers on, and stuffed my mouth full of chewing gum in a vain attempt to hide the stench of last night’s booze, I walked along the road to the Lidl. I’m surprised how quickly they threw it up. Well, not really, as the only bricks used in its contruction would appear to be the ones on the perimeter wall.

I was surprised to find there was a queue outside of approximately 20 people. There were a couple of photographers there, and some kiddies enternailer, who named himself “Magic Steve”. Now, I always say there’s nothing like originality, and that name is nothing like originality. He walked up and down the queue, clutching some type of stuffed animal he named Rocky.

It was a little too high-brow for me, so I just looked away Unfortunately, it means that for the rest of the day, I am going to have the various incarnations of the “Magical Trevor” swimming around my head.

Eventually, after a little announcement, some guy appeared, blabbed about something, and cut the cheesy red ribbon that had been haphazardly placed across the door.

Now, Marko, of #speccy, informed me that they stocked Cherry jaffa cakes. I can’t remember if I mentioned how much I loved them during my massive Paris review last year, but let me tell you, I love cherry jaffa cakes. Therefore, they were one of the first things to go into the trolley.

Now, at this point, I did my good deed for the day, and helped some random old woman get her deep fat fryer into the trolley. I was happy with the amount of stuff they had in there, they even had several different types of curry, which means I shall be attending more than once.

Of course, once I’d gotten home, the first thing I tried was the cherry jaffa cakes. Unfortunately, they are slightly different to the ones I had in Paris. They’re considerably smaller, and there’s less of the cherry filling. But the taste is there, albeit not as strong as the Paris ones.

I have yet to sample the curry. I shall try this at some point where I can string more than three words together. I don’t think I’ve fully woken up yet.