Let’s recap over the last few days, as they’ve been memorable.

On Tuesday, I started doing the front garden again. It was an absolute mess. Thanks to the lovely summer we haven’t had, I’d not had chance to cut the grass, so it was almost knee height. So, out comes the lawnmover. There’s something satisfying on seeing the grass disappear, and come out from underneath the lawnmower as green mush. Or, maybe that’s just me.

Next step was the privet. Now, this was a state. Much worse than the grass. Basically, it’s not been cut for about 2 months, as the neighbour borrowed the hedge cutter, and blew it up. That was nice.

So, it’s just been left to grow wild. I had once attempted to start cutting it with shears a couple of weeks ago. I got about an inch across before I realised it was a fruitless excersise and abandoned it, planning to go to Focus later that day and just buy a new hedge trimmer. This obviously hadn’t been done.

So, after making another tiny bit of progress across the hedge with the shears, I totally gave up, dragged Daddykins into the car, off we went to Focus. The only sole purpose for him being there was the 10% discount card he carries. We made our way to the hedge trimmer section and picked up THE BEAST. Bright green, bright yellow cable, blade approximately 2 feet long. This’ll do for me!

Off we went to the till, picking up a pair of sweeping brooms on the way. I flashed my credit card at the lovely young lady on the counter, while Daddykins flashed his discount card. By this time, however, the rain was lashing down, I had no chance of being able to do it today, so the beast of a machine would have to lie dormant for another day.

On the way back, I went to Nettos, had a good old chinwag with Elaine, who now works there, after giving Employment Palace the old heave-ho several months back. Off we went home, and I got prepared to go out for the night. The rain was still bouncing off the rain at this point. The day took a turn for the worse, as I suddenly realised that my wallet had vanished. I’d last had it when in Nettos. GAH! Luckily, I’d got cashback, so I still had some funds for the night, but I was obviously a bit concerned over my missing moolah holder.

Eventually, I had to leave, otherwise I’d have never got out. I left Daddykins looking for it for me. He’s nice like that.

While I was stood at the bus stop, my mobile rings. The wallet had been located, it was in my room, under my chair. Thank god for that. It was the first time my wallet had been missing for a long period since 14th March 2004

Anyhoo, that cheered me up, and I went to the club for a couple of games of snooker, and while the rain fell out of the sky at an alarming rate, I continued to pot balls at a strangely accurate rate.

Chris reunited me with my wallet, as he’d seen Daddykins downstairs in the bar. Several hours later, I returned home, and went to bed, as Wednesday was the delivery date of my camera. Hurrah!

I awoke early. This was nothing to do with the camera, but in fact my guts churning excess acid, probably down to the alcohol, and half a packet of beef slices I’d consumed before going to bed. Well, I say bed, I chose to sleep on the sofa, as my bed was filled with various computer parts, and I was too lazy (read drunk) to clear it off. Actually, there was another reason. I’d need to be near the door so I could answer it with enthusiasm should the delivery turn up early, instead of fighting my way into clothes as I headed down the stairs.

Obviously, thanks to that excess acid, I was awake and up early anyway, so it turned out I didn’t need to sleep on the sofa after all.

I started on some maintenance to the gallery DB, that killed an hour or so. It was 9AM, and the weather was looking quite decent. This obviously meant that it was time to attack the flea market, as is always the tradition on a Wednesday, assuming I’m not working, and the weather looks OK.

Now, when I go to the flea market, I’m always in a world of my own, as I have my music playing through earphones. I made a little pact with myself, similar to what I did with the Bruce Hornsby record. Anyway, I said to myself, that if I was ever listening to a song, and it appeared in the collection of records / CDs I was browsing at the time, then I’d buy it.

In all of the times I’ve been down the flea market with music playing, it’s never once happened. This time, it happened twice. Maybe I’ve just had obscure music playing in the past.

Just as the opening drum beat of “Teenage Kicks” by the Undertones started, I pulled out a CD entitled “The Sounds of the Suburbs”, and indeed,Teenage Kicks was on there. Therefore I bought it… it only cost me 50p. I’ve wanted this CD for ages anyway, as the cover contains a nice image of a concrete lamp post. I remember seeing it advertised way back in 1992.

I was flicking through a box of singles, whilst listening to “68 Guns” by the Alarm. Guess what appeared in the pile? Yes, that very song. I couldn’t go back on my “word” so bought it, along with another pile of records. Due to the current state of my computer equipment, I’ve played neither the CD or record, but more on that later.

I also bought some clothes pegs while I was there. I bet you really wanted to know that too.

At this point, I entered the town centre itself. Normally my first purchase would be the corned beef pasty from Greggs, but they have put their prices up again. From 73p, to 75p. Considering they have 3 stores in the shopping centre alone, they obviously can do without my trade, so I thought I’d take my business to one of the alternate bakeries.

This was a big mistake.

I bought some sausage rolls. I thought I’d get them in bulk, and take a couple home for my dad. This was a big mistake, as they were rank. Firstly, all 4 sausage rolls got put into the same bag, which instantly turned translucent from the grease. This meant it would be impossible for me to eat just one in the “half in the bag” tradition, without the other ones falling out.

I had to go to the poundshop and purchase something, just so I had a carrier bag to carry these home in.

With my sausage rolls slowly degrading, I hopped on the bus home, and returned back to Mercuryvapour Towers, clutching my belongings.

I got home, and inspected the sausage rolls. The bag was entirely translucent at this point, and the grease had seeped through into the base of the carrier bag. These were going to be… how you say… different?

I placed them on a plate, and took them into the living room. I had only taken one bite, when the doorbell rang. My camera was here! I’d only been in the house seven minutes! Suddenly, I’d lost all interest in the sausage rolls, and I headed to the door. I grabbed the box, signed for it, and unpacked everything, putting the battery on charge within minutes of it passing the threshold. I’d used one in the past, so I knew what to expect.

OK, so I had two hours to kill while the battery charge. Obviously I couldn’t really do much with it on a flat battery. This is where THE BEAST came into play. Yes, the hedge cutter I’d bought yesterday was going to have its first very public airing. Now, I was used to the old shitty thing we had previously. The old one had the cutting power of… something very blunt. I was expecting something similar from this one. I plugged it in, and off we went. Oh, my, it was like a knife through hot butter. The old one kept jamming at the single thought of a slightly tough twig. This one just ate them. It even came with the interesting smell of burning components! I assumed that this was because it was new, so didn’t really bother. It worked perfectly.

Unfortunately, as the summer is almost officially over, I’ll not get a chance to use it again until next spring. You’d better believe I’ll be counting down the days until I get to break out THE BEAST again. Anyone want their hedge cutting? Only joking.

Soo, after sweeping up the majority of the clippings, I head back into the house to check the status of my camera battery. Just as I approached it, the LED switched from red to green, meaning it was fully charged. Wooooooo! I abandoned the hedge clippings, and returned to the camera.

Daddykins assisted me a great deal, by managing to work out how the hell the neck strap goes on. Eventually, after working out how to fit the lens, I was all ready to go. I was a bit concerned about my memory card. Andrew D had bought a fast-speed one for his. I didn’t, hoping and praying that my range of memory cards would be suitable. Thankfully, I’m happy to report that they are, and all of the cards work fine with the camera, even the 32Mb Kodak MMC card (though it takes 10 times longer to do a low-level format than it does with the other larger cards)

The camera upgrade does mean one important thing. It means that after only 40 minutes of the battery being charged, I was able to take images such as this one…

The only thing I need to purchase now is a tripod. I tried taking some night shots without one, they were abysmal. I also need a remote.

Obviously, I’ll post updates in the next few days

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